Life has been crazy in the Pierre home this year… I can’t
believe we are already 1/3rd of the way through 2012. It is flying by.
I’m not gonna lie, adjusting to being a mama of 4 kids has
been…an adjustment. I’m pretty much
tired all the time, waking up about twenty minutes after my first cup of
coffee, and have a hard time remembering what day of the week it is. But all
that being said…I am enjoying every minute of our precious little foster baby. I love playing with her, watching her meet
her developmental milestones, seeing my children interact with her, hearing
them pray for her, seeing her thrive, watching Vermon deeply connect with her, talking to God about what he has in store
for her, and developing a special friendship with her wonderful Grandma who is
anxiously awaiting the many bureaucratic loop-holes that need to be jumped
through so her grand-baby can move into her forever home several states away
from here.
I have learned so much about myself, our family, and our
calling to care for children. It was
easy for me to talk about how God’s
word shows me how to love children who aren’t mine, but it has been another
thing to actually walk through it. I
used to be easy for me to think and speak about how we are all the same before
God, but to actually live that out as I interact with bio family and move
toward them with a pursuing love was harder then I imagined. It is easy to say we are called to suffer for
Jesus and that knowing him makes this current affliction seem light &
momentary…but it becomes easy to forget when I am working through the painful
emotions that come up as our little one begins to transition from being our foster
daughter to her wonderfully awaiting grandma. It was easy for me to say we are
called to care for orphans, but it really isn’t easy unless you are Superwoman
(I am not) and it is very, very consuming.
Having a baby that we will not be keeping forever has
challenged all my beliefs about foster parenting and helped confirm in us why we
are doing this. I am not sure if we will do this with two children or twenty…for
six more months or six more years… but I do know that this journey has been
amazing and that I am more passionate then ever about foster care….and so
appreciative of the unfailing love of
Jesus.
I wrote this a few days ago and I am still unpacking all
that it means to me...I am hoping to write more soon on all that I am learning through this journey:
"I can deeply love a child as though they are
mine, even though they are only "mine" for a small portion of their
life...because my maternal love was a free gift given to me by my gracious
Father and therefore it doesn't belong to me. It belongs to whatever children
God brings in my path and asks me to mother. 6 months or 60 years...from my
body or another woman's...from the perspective of eternity, it will all seem
the same-maybe even richer."
